“Edwin Drood” song parody
At the closing night festivities following the APPLAUSE! Musicals production of “The Mystery of Edwin Drood”, I presented the cast with my musical creation: a takeoff on the tongue-twisting tune from the show, “Both Sides of the Coin”. Inspiration struck on Friday and by late Saturday night it was all done! Here are the lyrics. (See the video here).
THE STORY OF EDWIN DROOD
Edwin Drood was quite a show, it’s entertaining don’t you know
And yet to do it’s not so easy as it looks,
Here in the group we call Applause we have to practice without pause
for just one week – thank God we get to keep our books!
We learned each step and every line in barely thirty hours’ time
And yes, it must be said that isn’t very long.
Well you may think that’s quite a feat but now you’re in for quite a treat
I’ll now relate the tale complete, in just one song
===========================
Jasper and Rosa are teacher and student, he’s madly in love but it wouldn’t be prudent
He’s really quite mad he’s a Jekyll and Hyde and his lusting approaches she cannot abide.
Drood of our tale is his nephew named Edwin but old uncle Johnny may bash nephew’s head in
For his love of Rosa is driving him mad and if Drood were departed he’d be jolly glad!
Neville the foreigner’s in from Ceylon and he sports an odd accent that no-one can place then he
Demonstrates hot-blooded feelings for Rosa which soon has him getting in young Edwin’s face.
Helena follows, the sister of Neville who could be the enemy of our young Ned she is
Just like her brother a fiery spirit and like him she wears some odd things on her head!
Now we descend to the opium den where the Princess named Puffer is doing her time
Who should we see here but wicked old Jasper, Hallucinatory on laudanum wine
Rounding it out is the Rev’rend Crisparkle an angular fellow a man of the cloth
Yet he reveals a tale quite unexpected, he once was to Rosa’s late mother betrothed
Watching a play it is quite ordinary to wish for a respite from drama and grief
Luckily characters quite secondary are there to provide us with comic relief!
Durdles and Deputy rise to the challenge they’re ready to go if the energy lags for there’s
one who’s a stumbling bumbling joker and one who is there just to highlight the gags!
(ba-dum- CHUK!)
Then there’s the fellow with never the luck why he must have the tiniest part in the show
I’m speaking of Bazzard whose lifelong obsession is how to get closer toward the front row
Fin’ly Mayor Sapsea, a curious chap, he is never on stage for exceedingly long
Mostly his role is just expository and also to sing us a tongue twisting song!
Edwin goes out in a horrible storm and our truncated tale never sees him return,
Leaving us hanging with nary an ending so how the tale ends we may not ever learn.
But will that stop us? Why quite to the contrary, never so clever a trick have you spied
We get the audience members to tell us who killed Edwin Drood (and if even he died)!
But they couldn’t do it without…
Adam and Ashley Chris Linda and Maribeth, Evan DJ Leah Megan and Matt
Judy and Jaclyn and Scott, Randy Mary plus Caitlin Dane Val Tara Calvin – that’s that.
That’s the finale the song is near ended but just a bit longer I have to go on,
I must thank our remarkable team of production that’s Ryan Jen Steven and Scott Ashton Swan!
…and now we are doooooone!